Acceptance

Today, I'm accepting that I cannot make everyone happy. Here's what is on my mind- In my last blog I mentioned that I was going to paint the kitchen wall, since we all had mentioned we didn't like the neon green color that it was. So, I sent one of my roomates a text (she was out of town) and I asked her if it was ok that I paint the wall and I told her I was doing a calm blue color, her response was that I was a dork for doing that on a friday night and that was it. So I assumed she didn't care, so with the help of my other roomate we picked out a blue we liked and I painted the wall, I went to Jarads after that and just got back home today (sunday) and she was home so I was like, what do you think of the wall?! Her response? "you want my honest opinion?" So I said ok, you don't like it.. why? She said, "I'm just not a blue person, but I'll just deal with it" - So I said well I'm sorry, I feel bad you don't like it, but why didn't you say anything when I told you I was thinking blue and asked if you wanted something different, her response, "I didn't think you would actually do it" - Now, she has been my friend and roomate long enough to know that when I say I'm doing a project I mean like I'm going to do it, right now. So now she says well its fine whatever, which we all know means I hate it, and every time I look at it I'm going to hate you.

DAMNIT- what am I supposed to do? Repaint the wall? I would, I really don't care.. but then she is going to make a big deal about that, and honestly I don't want to give in.. I'm not stuck on this color, i'm just stuck in the fact that I think she would hate any color I pick.. that's just been her attitude to me lately. It roots in the fact that her and my ex Dennis have become extremely buddy buddy lately, and because Dennis is hurting because of me, it makes her have a snotty attitude towards me. It sucks, and I'm not sure what to do about it. I hate feeling awkward in my own home. The other thing is, since I haven't been home much because I've been spending time at Jarad's - I feel like she is disregarding me, like I don't matter.. I'm not a part of her "posse" anymore so she could care less about me. The bitchy side of me wants to paint that damn wall bright pink. haha- I'm hoping it will eventually blow over... either she will accept the wall or I will do something else that pisses her off even more.. who knows. You just can't make everyone happy.